The Daily Mire

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Steve Bannon Leaves Breitbart To Take On Establishment At Local Elementary School

The infamous Steve Bannon has announced that he is leaving Breitbart. Bannon has been at the helm of the right-wing news agency since shortly after Andrew Breitbart’s death. Bannon’s departure serves as the final nail in a coffin that was built by Bannon, for Bannon. Somehow, the former White House Chief Strategist remains resolute despite the public humiliation that he experienced of late. “This doesn’t change anything. My mission remains. Frankly, this is the best thing that could’ve happened to me, I’m untethered and I can finally fight the establishment,” said Bannon, “the establishment at Pinewood Elementary School.” Bannon had already booked a speaking gig in Mrs. Roberts 1st grade class room. The Daily Mire was the only press granted access. “There are people here, pulling the levers of the power structures in ways you won’t beleive,” Bannon explained to the children, “your principal and her band of globalist thugs don’t have your interests at heart. They are slaves to the district. Why should Edison Elementary get a new set of handballs, when you kids raised the most money at last year’s Fun Run?” At this point the School administration intervened and escorted Bannon from Mrs. Roberts class. Speaking off district property, while being watched by school security from about fifty feet away, Bannon reiterated his determination to break the establishments grip on Pinewood Elementary exclaiming “this is war.” The district has since filed a restraining order against Mr. Bannon. /


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